Well hi. It’s been a minute, hasn’t it? We at Cooking Rage have had a really great summer, how about you? Honestly, summer 2020 has been filled with so much sunshine, hopscotch, lemonade, and endless, just endless amounts of bullshit. So much bullshit it’s actually kinda hard to believe it’s only September!
We recently made this cake on the day we became a no-income family after being a single-income family, having taken a leave of absence at the school that is opening despite teaching entirely indoors, cutting teachers’ pay by about 40%, and increasing teaching hours in aforementioned potentially extremely hazardous conditions. You know what works really well? American Capitalism. Another word for this is fascism. Here’s the recipe!
Leave of Absence Cake
Take a bunch of elderly blueberries and throw them into a bowl with flour and stuff. Who fucking cares?
Black Lives Matter. Tax the rich. Protect and advocate for voting rights. This is basic shit. Also: who has a room temperature egg at the ready for a stress baking project? Who fucking DOES that?!
Mix in wet with a spatula. Or you can use your hands because what the fuck.
Make a crumble topping and by that we mean we must crumble systemic racism through direct action, volunteering, donating, showing up, speaking out, and VOTING FOR BIDEN/HARRIS.
Bake at 400 degrees. Eat when it’s done. Climate change is real.